shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
