And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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