i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
