I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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