I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
