well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
