Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Randomize
