where am i from again
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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