Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Randomize
