We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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