He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize