just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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