I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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