I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
