I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
