I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
