Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
