I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
