Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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