dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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