I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
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