It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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