i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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