You work out of a Hotel?
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
