420 ftw
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
