Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize
