If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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