Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
