I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
