They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
