Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
