Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
