Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
