so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Randomize
