Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
