Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
NoShamevember. You game?
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
The adults are the big ones right?
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
