i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
