I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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