the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
