Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
