I look better un-naked...
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Randomize
