im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
