Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
