May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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