she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
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