If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
