Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize