He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
