Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I don't deserve a penis
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
