I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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