I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
