PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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